remember. repent. repeat.

 "Nevertheless I have somewhat against thee, because thou hast left thy first love."

Revelation 2:4

I know, I am an English major & my title for this post seems a little odd. Remember. Repent. Repeat. The title is more than three words, it's three imparative commands. Three "thou shalts", if you will. But here, I'm getting ahead of myself, let me give you some context. Last week we had spring revival services on campus with Dr. Tom Farrell. Though I have grown up under the preaching of this amazing man of God, I always know that the Lord will challenge me to change through Dr. Farrell's messages. This past week was no different.

On Monday, January 11, Dr. Farrell spoke on "The Danger of Desertion" from Revelation 2:4. His challenge: "have you left your first Love?" He introduced the answer of this question with an equation: Life - Love = NOTHING. Not the love of one man to another, though, as Christians, we are required to do so, but the love that I, a wretched sinner, show to my glorious Savior, Christ.

I am not articulate enough to persuade you with the passion of Dr. Farrell, but I will share with you his answer to "how would you know if you had left your first love?"

1. A coolness towards the Savior
   "You will never work right until you worship right."
2. A caulousness about sin
   "Can I prove by my watcing & listening that I really LOVE Christ?"
3. A contendtedness about self
   "The closer you get to Jesus the less you will love yourself."
   "Am I abhoring any & all sin that God points out?"
4. A carelessness about souls
   "Here, read this & meet me in heaven someday."
5. A contendedness among the saints
   The church belongs to Christ. I am honored to serve in it.
   

Dr. Farrell closed by challenging us with those three imparatives: Remember. Repent. Repeat. The irony of the message really hit me when I got back to my room to do my devotions. What should my devotions be but Revelation 2?! God prepared my heart for my devotions as Dr. Farrell preached.

So, next time you read Revelation 2:4, ask yourself, "have I left my first love?" If the answer is yes, evaluate yourself, remember who God is, repent, &, if needed, repeat.

filled to the full

God provides. Do you know that? I don't mean do you understand the statement, but have you ever seen God provide for you personally? I have. Boy howdy, have I.


Philippians 4:19 (AMP) says, And my God will liberally supply (fill to the full) your every need according to His riches in glory in Jesus Christ.


It is true that I have seen the Lord provide thoughout my life. Not just in little ways either. In big ways: money for the bills, watching over Dad with his appendix & me with my surgery two years ago, protection from car wrecks & fires, & security, just to name a few. Philippians 4:19 says that He will provide for our every need. My family & I have seen Him provide for our needs in the past, but this time He really "knocked our woolly socks off".


Jarid married Lindsay in Phoenix, Arizona on 01.01.10. It was a wonderful time for my family, but the combination of the event, the trip, & the soon beginning of second semester equalled great financial strain for my family. I had to clean out my savings for my down payment & I was still going to be short. Craig had nothing.Not two pennies to rub together.  NOTHING. I am a worrier & I love my brother, so it took alot of faith to believe that the Lord was going to provide. But I knew He would. He was asking Mom & I to wait so we could see Him work & so we would know, beyond a shadow of a doubt, that college was not paid by Mom or me, but my Him.

Craig & I had to be on campus January 4th for Craig's preterm class. That's right, Craig took a whole class whithout know how the Lord was going to provide for him to stay for the rest of the semester. I was praying. Craig was praying. Mom & Dad were praying. We knew the Lord would provide because we were all confident that the Lord had called Craig to Maranatha.
The down payment ws due on Monday, January 11th. On Saturday, January 9th, I got a call from Mom. The GI Bill had finally gone  though. The Lord was providing. Not just that, Dad's "lost" pay was rectified. The Lord was providing! Philippians 4:19 (AMP) says the Lord will "liberally supply" or "fill to the full" your every need, but the Lord did more than that, He gave us a want too. On Saturday night, while I was still bubbling with excitement over the new Mom had shared with me that mornig, Crystal texted me: "I just won a Wii!" I thought she was kidding (she is, after all, my big sister). It couldn't be true. The Lord gave us not only the money we needed for college, but also a Wii? Is God really that good? Yes, He really is.


My skepticism came back on Monday, Down Payment Day. AKA: The Worst Day of the Semester (it always makes me feel poor & I hate that feeling). I just knew that the business office would give us trouble, saying they couldn't accept the finanial aid statement without money. You never know how fast the government will give you the money they say they have given you. So, with grumblings in my heart, Craig & I headed to the financial aid office. After a rather short conversation with Mr. Roth, who is in charge of military financial aid, Craig & I got our packets (after a rather long wait) & headed to the registration room with our financial aid slips in hand. While we waited our turn in the business office line so they could update our financial aid, I looked at my bill to calculate how much I would have left to pay. That's when it sank in. That's when I realized I had a sudden fondness for this particular registration day. The day I hated so much. That is when I realized how good God had truly been to Craig & I -- & to my family. I'm no good at math, but even I could calculate that my financial aid would exceed what I had left on my bill. And not by just a little. By ALOT. Not just mine either, Craig had a significant surplus too! GOD IS GOOD! As the men in the business office entered the new financial aid, Criag & I could not stop laughing. God had provided for us in a miraculous way! He had truly "filled to the full" all of our needs!


I don't know how the rest of the semester will go or what surprises the next few month holdl, but I know tha tthe Lord will provide. Not just my needs, but my wants too.

Psalm 118:23--This is the Lord's doing; it is MARVELLOUS in our eyes.

new year = happily ever after

01.01.10 was, for the entire world, the beginning of both a new year & a new decade. For my family 01.01.10 holds a little more significance--the beginning of a new stage & our first "happily ever after". You see, this New Year had us all celebrating a new beginning of another kind: the new beginning of a family. At one o'clock in the afternoon of 01.01.10, Jarid married Lindsay Foote. The bride was beautiful. The groom handsome. The wedding a success.

My mind has not fully comprehended the fact that Jarid is married & beginning a life of his own with Lindsay. Some days I still feel like a junior higher & Jarid is still my silly big brother (not that that has really changed). It's just different.

I'm thrilled to have Lindsay as part of the family, but 01.01.10 marked a huge change in my life. How many more things will change over the years? Who can tell. I'm trusting in the Author of my life, looking forward to the day when I will begin my own "happily ever after". An exciting & scary time has started, & I can't wait to see what this new year will hold for me & for my family.

Happy New Year & Happy New Beginnings