i stand alone

Sometimes I feel as though I am standing alone. It's a selfish thought, as I always have friends & family who support me, but the thought does overtake me sometimes. This thought takes form in two ways: lonliness & defense of Christian principles.

My senior year of high school was hard. I chose to do the right thing & felt like Daniel: I stood alone. It was hard to look around & realize that classmates & friends didn't want to stand with me. Even good friends, who wanted to the right thing, would refuse to stand with me because they wanted to be liked by everyone else. I hold nothing against them--I've felt that way myself. Senior trip, I think, was the time where I looked up & said, "God, I stand alone. Does no one else love you?" That question has run though my mind constantly since then. It wasn't until a message sometime last semester that I realized that there are others who feel as though they, too, stand alone.

This summer I have selfishly thought that I stand alone. Not spiritually, but socially. It is not a secret that I do not have close friends my own age at home. Coming home ment I would be able to spend more time with my parents and siblings, but no hope for friends. Until recently, I was upset & chose to feel lonely. My college friends seemed to be having fun with friends from their hometown, my best friend announced her engagement, & my brothers were spending time with their friends. I was so disappointed about being seperated from my good college friends that I didn't notice the friends God has given me: my family, specifically my parents.

I was upset on Thursday because I was spending my day off by going to Craig's basketball game. I usually love watching Craig in his many sports, but because I felt that I stood alone, I was grumpy & annoyed. My parents kept asking me what I wanted to do--all I could think was, "nothing with you! I want to hang out with my friends, who aren't here!" I finally opened up to my dad. He said, "Life sucks sometimes. I know what you're going through. Mom & I don't have many friends either & our lives are consumed with you kids--& that's ok. You know you can always spend time with me & Mom." He got me to laugh; what he said was the truth & it made sense. That's when it hit me: my best friends have been in front of me the entire time. My parents give me everything--even their time--& I didn't want to spend a little of my free time with them. I have often run to my mom for advise, a hug, or some girl talk. Though we don't talk alot, my dad has always been a comfort to me right when I need it, especially recently. I don't stand alone; my parent have been, are, & will always be there for me.

I don't know what you're going through. But if you, like me, feel like you stand alone, look around, God has given you some amazing friends that will always be there for you. Friends who will stand with you when you choose to go against the grain & do the right thing. Friends who are there for you when your other friends are scattered across the country for the summer. I've said it often, but it's true: God is good. He knows that as humans, we need friends to surround us. Even if no one is physically there for you, remember, God is always standing at your side & you never have to say, "I stand alone."