once upon a time--second semester

The first day of a new semester. I was excited to be back on campus. I was ready to conquor the next step & see friends once again. Have you ever heard the saying "Don't plan on tomorrow, because you don't know what tomorrow holds?" Well, it's true.

I arrived safely back on campus on Sunday evening. After unpacking all of my things, After meeting my new roommate, I talked to Kristin, Kim, Michelle, and Bekah, made plans for the following day (registration) and then headed for bed. Life was great.

Monday morning I woke up feeling fine. As I began getting ready to head up to Old Main to register I began having the most immense back pain. I tried to ignore the pain, but it hurt soo bad. After talking to Jarid & Mom on the phone, I was considering waiting until later in the afternoon to register. Instead of waiting, I determined that getting registration done early meant I could relax the rest of the afternoon. So, I forced myself to ignore the pain & went to registration at 8 am. I could not hide the pain I was in. I completed registration as quickly as possible, then headed back to my dorm room to sleep--after all, every time you are sick that's what your mom tells you to do, right? I could not sleep. Lying down only made the pain worse. At noon, Kat convinced me to go to the health center--it was closed until 1:30 pm. I groaned and asked her to have Jarid pick me up and take me to the health center again at 1:30. I went back to my room and tried to sleep--no luck. By 1:15 the pain was worse than before and I watched my cell phone count off the minutes until 1:30. Jarid was late, as usual. I waited for four minutes and then walked myself to the health center. I was tired of waiting in pain.


The school nurse, Mrs. Muse, was back in the health center when I arrived about twenty til one. I explained my pain to her and she sent me to the girls' beds in the basement of the building. She followed me down about five minutes later. She thought I had a kidney stone & wanted to take me to ER immediately. I called Mom & Jarid to let them know what was going on & headed to Watertown Hospital. After filling out of the medical history blah bla blah...I was taken to a room and Dr. Smith (no joke) came to check on me. He asked many of the same questions as Mrs. Muse, and like her believed that I had a kidney stone, but he wanted to take a CT scan to be sure. As I waited to be taken to get the CT scan, Jarid & Kat arrived and Mrs. Muse left. I was told after the CT scan that they did not find what they were looking for & that they needed to take a second CT scan. Before the second scan, Jarid & Kat had to leave to attend the special (required) services on campus, so my dorm supervisor, Hayley came to wait with me. The results of the second CT scan showed that I had internal bleeding in my lower abdomen and needed to have surgery ASAP. Most of the day I had been entirely calm. I joked with everybody & anticipated being back on campus later that evening, now I was slightly worried, but I still had fun (especially as 3 different nurses each tried twice to start a second IV--I was actually cheering them on: "Get that IV in there!!"). Hayley was working on making sure Jarid would be able to see me before I headed in for surgery. Five minutes before the nurses wheeled me out to the OR, Jarid & Dr. & Mrs. Brown came in to see me. The Browns prayed with me & I immediately felt the Lord's strength and knew that everything was in His hands. Kim, Kris Lloyd, Bekah, Michelle, & Sarah saw me in the hallway as I headed to surgery.

The surgery was successful & I am thankful for the friends who came and visited me & the doctors and nurses who took special care of me. It was the first time in my life I have gone to the doctor without my mother. The surgery was on Monday evening (January 7) & I was back in classes on Thursday--I don't like staying off of my feet for too long. I am doing much better now, though I am still find myself getting tired as my body continues to heal. I have a back to school story unlike anybody else. From pain to the health center to the ER to the OR--yeah, I'd have to say that was a very exciting first day.

the gift of family

Christmas was different this year. The differences helped me realize that Christmas is more than gifts and bragging rights. It's a time to spend with family and enjoy time together. Circumstances that the Lord brought into my life this year helped me realize how important it is to spend time with family.

Christmas in our family always started on Christmas Eve. Grandpa Frank would come to our house for Christmas dinner. He would stay over until nearly midnight. Just before he would leave Dad would let us open one present each. This year was...different. Grandpa passed away one week ago today. Dad did NOT want us to be by ourselves this year, so Auntie M, Uncle Rusty, Paul, Timothy, Peter, Andrew, & Arrena came to our house to celebrate Christmas Eve. It was different, but it was a good different. Paul & I took the opportunity to teach Arrena how to play ping-pong.

Christmas morning has always started with omletes--yum! No change here. I was the first one of the kids up and Dad made me a delicious omlete. Dad made omletes for each of us as we woke up and came into the living room. Omletes. Eggy golden goodness filled with olives, onions, cheese, & ham. I LOVE it!! After breakfast we would open stockings, the remaining presents, & then head over to Grandmommy & Papa's to celebrate Christmas with Mom's family. Well, we haven't gone to grandma & grandpa's in a couple years--they have spent Christmas in Texas with Uncle Russell, Aunt Debbie, & Carena. So, Christmas is just our family. Different. Our gift to each other this year was different too. Rather than spending money on gifts that would set gather dust laying around the house, my parents decided to put the money they would have spent on gifts toward making sure that Crystal, Jarid, & I can stay in college. I think it's the best gift I have ever been given.

This Christmas I realized that Christmas is more than snow, trees, lights, & gifts. It's about family. The love & friendship of family is unique to every individual. Family is the best gift that can be given or received at Christmas.

drip, drip, drop

I am not one to openly cry, but yesterday, the tears came often. Just after noon yesterday Dad informed me that Grandpa Frank had passed away.

Christmas is going to be different this year. Amidst the lazy falling snowflakes tears will fall each time we remember Grandpa. Grandpa Frank always came over for Christmas dinner on Christmas Eve. He drank coffee and slipped slices of ham in to Greyson's dish, always claiming that dogs should get to celebrate Christmas too. He called me Grandma--I never really knew why, but I liked it because it made me feel special. He would never leave until he got a kiss from each of us grandkids. He is one of the very few people I would let kiss me, let alone me kiss them. Tears will fall when I become selfish at all the things he is going to miss: me graduating from college, bringing home a boy, getting married, having kids. Since I left for college Grandpa kept asking where my boyfriend was. He thought it odd that I was waiting on God's timing, but he would relish in the fact that he was the "only" boy getting a kiss from me.

I'm not going to lie or try to sugar-coat the facts, as far as we know, Grandpa Frank was not saved. I think that is what hurts the most. Knowing that for the past 15+ years my family has been a faithful witness to him and he rejected the free gift of eternal life. He was an amazing man. I have never seen someone display such undying love. He cared about each of us and wanted us to succeed in life. He never quite undersood why Crystal, Jarid, & I chose to attend a Christian college, but he could see our dedication to serve the Lord.

But, God works in ALL circumstances. My uncle and cousin seem to be open to the Gospel right now. The death of my grandpa affected them greatly--they are thinking more than ever before about spiritual things. Again I am reminded of my life verse, "And we know that ALL things work together for good, to them that love God, to them who are the called according to His purpose." There is nothing I can do for my grandpa now, but God has given my family an amazing opportunity to be a witness to my Dad's family.

Will I cry at the funeral? Yes, if not outwardly, my heart will be crying. But my tears will only last during this life. I have hope and confidence in eternal salvation. I know exactly where I am going when I die. My purpose now is to show Christ's love to my family so I can see them for all eternity.

winter ball

December is such a beautiful time of year. The snow falls and makes everything a winter wonderland. The wind, though terribly cold, adds a natural rosieness to everyone's cheeks--a fresh look that cannot be achieved with makeup. Everything seems to whisper of beauty and romance.

Just before a hard week of finals, Maranatha's choirs and orchestra performed Handel's Messiah. It was amazing to see how many families from the community came to hear our students perform. It was as beautiful and romantic as the pure white world outside the Gymnatorium. Kristin, Kat, Khristina, Tim, and I went together on Friday evening to enjoy the beautiful production. It was a beautiful "winter ball".

After the concert, we met up with Jarid and then headed over to Watertown Bowl with about 50 other Maranatha students for a different kind of winter ball: late night of bowling--11:30-1:30 a.m. We had so much fun! Some of Jarid's roommates and friends joined us so we could fill two lanes. After the first game we enacted the "push-up" rule--for every pin left standing at the end of your turn you had to do one push-up. I'm not going to lie, I had to do the most. I can tell you, however, that I had the best form--whatever that is worth.

poor unfortunate soul 2

God chooses to work in amazing ways. He allows people to be the instrument by which He blesses and encourages His children.

Not to long ago, my computor died without cause or explination. It was a bummer and a slight inconvienience, but not a detrimental loss. Just before Thanksgiving, my aunt let me know that she had a surprise waiting for me when I got home. I refused to guess what it might be--I tend to dream too high too often, and I did not want to prepare myself for a let down. Early in the afternoon the day before Thanksgiving my mom and I went to my aunt's house to drop off my dead computer--my uncle was going to see if he could fix it for me. Instead of fixing my computer, he gave me a new-to-me laptop! He had heard through one of my cousins that my computer had died and decided to give me one as a gift before my aunt even knew I had a need!

God is so good! I was truly able to say that I am thankful for the way He provides, especially when He chooses to work through those we love most, like our family.

you've got a friend in me

Anything done alone is boring, but when six college students get together, staring at cars can be fun. Among all the stress of tests, papers, & projects it's nice just to relax & enjoy the company of friends (even if you are related to one of them).

There isn't much that Kristin, Khristyna, Kat, Jarid, Tim, & I don't do together--or at least with some of the other members of the group. From relaxing & studying in the coffee shop to Guesstures to bowling, ice skating, and shopping we most definately entertain ourselves.

Saturday was not out of the ordinary. After changing our plans for the zillianth, we finally got off campus (YAY!). We played pool, Guesstures, & fooseball in the student center then headed to Mullen's for some of the best ice cream I've ever had. Full of sugar and dairy, we headed to the bowling alley to enjoy some down time together. Strikes and gutterballs where the least of our concern as we just enjoyed goofing off together.

What can I say? Life is just more fun when you've got a friend like me.

poor provential life

The cost of college has be weighing heavily on my mind. Wouldn't it be nice if my bill was the same of those who first came to Maranatha in 1968? I am thankful that my parents want me to work for my education. It gives me the feeling that it is truly MY education--after all I am paying for part of it. I will be able to look back in five years and say that I helped my parents give me more than a "poor provential life."

It would be nice, though, to be part of one of those financial blessings that you always read about in college magazines. You know, the student who was working hard & praying for the finances to complete the semester & out of no where they receive a financial "gift" that could have only come from the Lord. I can say that I am one of those students.

In late September I completed an essay for a financial scholarship. I turned in with a week in advance & prayed for the best. The day before the deadline, the scholarship committee asked me to send them a piece of information before they could enter my essay into running. Because of different circumstances, I was unable to send them the item they requested & gave up hoping that I would be awarded the scholarship.

On Thursday, November 8, 2007, Mom called me after returning from leadership camp. She passively told me that a large envelope had come in the mail for me with no return address. She was going to throw it away with the other junk mail, but decided to open it just to see what it was. The letter began:
"Dear Ms. Lawson,
Congratulations! You have been selected to receive. . . "
The letter went on to tell me the specifics of winning the scholarship. I SCREAMED!! My roommate nearly fell off her bed, computer & all. I ran down my hallway screaming. How great is my God?! I had been praying for two months for the Lord's help financially. He answered my prayer in such a way that I know only He could have worked. I received a scholarship that I thought I had absolutely no chance of winning!

My God is my Father. He owns a cattle on a thousand hills. Why do I ever doubt the power He has? I do not deserve the love He show toward me.